SHE: Becoming a Butterfly

She sat in the car trying to will herself to open the car door, get out of the car, and go inside.
She knew that the conversation that was about to happen was going to hurt, both her and him.
For years she had tried to have this conversation. She had begged, cajoled, argued, screamed, and whispered for him to acknowledge her words.
With every breath she had, she tried to fight to fix what as wrong.
She gave up her friends.
She gave up her family.
She gave up her career to a point.
She became what she swore she would never become.
An invisible, overlooked, stressed, overworked, roommate.
A maid. A mother. A cook. A butler. An errand girl.

Not a wife.
Not a loved one.
Not someone that was cherished.
Not someone that was protected.
Not someone that was DESIRED.

The phone and it's "Smart" capabilities became more important than her.
He became anti-social when they were with family and friends.
He began to tell her that he "Didn't marry her for her looks, but rather her brain!"
Those words cut like a knife.
He began to talk to others.
He ignored her even more.
He shoved in her face that she was not desireable, even if he did not realize it.

She began to resent him.
She began to resent her life.
She began to resent all the things he had cost her.

Like being a mother to her own children.
Like being a mother to children without a mother or father.

Until one day, like a worm in a cocoon, she began to transform.
Making lifestyle changes that would greatly affect her future for the positive.
She started to make healthy choices.
She started to be more active; choosing to walk and lift weights instead of sitting on the couch.
She spent many hours walking, contemplating, and crying over what could have been and what had been.
She started to see a difference.
She started to feel happier.
She started to feel more energy.

Funny thing started to happen...
She was noticed more by others.
She was told by others she was beautiful (even though she sometimes did not feel beautiful).
She was told by others she was desirable.

So, as she sat in the car, afraid to get out and go inside to have another round of talks, which he would shut her down and say not now, no way, or I don't want to talk about this,
She heard him tell her that she was "NOT getting rid of me....You will have to kill me first, I am NOT going anywhere!!" and it scared her.

Emerging from her cocoon as a beautiful butterfly,
She straightened her back, took a deep breath, got out of the car and went inside.
She looked him in the eye and said........................................................