the_disappearing_librarian

I hate when old monsters in my life come back to haunt me time and time again.  No matter how far I go, and how much I accomplish as an adult, there are times that just a look or a word, or a perceived snub, takes me back to my time in school and even in my early 20's and how some would treat me.  No, I wasn't bullied....back then even bullying wasn't called bullying per say.  But, I was teased and made fun of.  I was always taller and bigger than the other girls.  Most of the boys, at least some of the more popular ones, definitely had a cruel streak....even if it wasn't a big streak. I can remember walking down the hallway in high school and the boys lined up at their lockers making sounds "Boom! Boom! Boom!" to the beat of my footsteps...."I feel an earthquake happening....oh wait!.....It's just Tracy!"  and them beating on their lockers as I walked by making it seem as if I was shaking the entire school.  Thank goodness for the guys and gal...

The old saying is "Letting go is hard to do"....and that is right on the money.  Whether it is letting go of hatred, or failed relationships, or old friendships where the two friends have grown apart and no longer share the same interests...it is still very hard for us as humans to let go.  Why? Why is it so hard to look at the other person and say to ourselves, "They are unhappy and I am making them that way. I need to let them go so they can discover their happiness again." We see the extreme results of refusing to let go all the time....usually on the news or on Dateline...one party decides that the only way to let go is to get rid of the other, usually through death.  And then we see the family and friends telling anyone and everyone that will listen, "I never thought they would do such a thing." "He/She was such a nice and friendly person that loved their family"...I am sure they were. But what is it that takes that love for their family and...